MIFFY: Bigger, Longer & Uncut
by coldplaywhore
Summary: Outtakes and Extended Scenes from Maybe I'm Falling For You by flightlessbird11 and coldplaywhore. Rated M for lemons, lemons, lemons
1. Fandom Gives Back Outtake: The Bookstore

**A/N: **

**CPW: So, there was this awesome auction that ended a few days ago, you might have heard of it… fandom gives back?**

**FLB11: Get to the point. You do realize our readers are sitting there in shock right now.**

**CPW: Meh… they're loyal and they love my wordiness.**

**FLB11: Not in author notes, whore.**

**CPW: Yeah yeah… whatever. Anywhoo, so the lovely Risbee purchased me in the aforementioned auction and was the first to request her one shot, so here it is. **

**FLB11: We had been tossing this idea around to happen much later in the story, but why wait right? **

**CPW: So thanks Risbee for your wonderful donation. We hope you enjoy your smuttake!**

**FLB11: We don't own Twilight, we just have friends with very DURTY minds and we love them more for it.**

**EPOV**

What the hell was that? She had kissed me, the sweetest and most glorious kiss of my twenty something years and then she ran like hell. What the fuck was I supposed to do now? If it were up to me, I would have run after her and begged her to kiss me again, just one more time. I wanted her to talk to me, and I wanted to let her know that she could. I lifted my hands up to my lips and swore I could still feel her mouth against mine. It was soft, sweet and god she tasted good. _Fuck, when did I turn into such a fucking girl?_

I grabbed a cold beer from my fridge, quickly pulling the cap off and tossing it onto the counter, where it clanged loudly against the marble. I then threw myself down on the couch and began staring at the photos on my wall, unsure of what the hell I should do next. Do I tell Bella I like her? Do I tell Penny that I like Bella? Do I take a shower, because I feel like it's been days since I had one? I felt like ass as I downed the rest of my beer greedily and headed up the stairs into my bathroom.

I stripped down, tossing my clothes into a pile in the corner, as the water heated up. As I stepped into the shower, letting the hot water soothe my aches and pains. The time away to Chicago, although fun with the exception of my mother, had been draining both physically and mentally. I lathered up my body and then washed my hair as my mind wandered, to Penny.

We had spoken very little while I was away, but that didn't mean that my thoughts of her had faded any. The promise of what was to come between us suddenly brought forth several images and before I had a chance to realize it, I had my cock firmly in hand and was stroking it slowly to images of her and me together. As jerked myself slightly, my image of Penny turned into Bella, which made my cock twitch excitedly.

Thankfully for me, I already had some body wash on my hand, which made my task all the more easier, as I began running my hand down my hard length. I was overcome with visions of Bella bent over my desk in the living room as I took her from behind. Her long hair running sensually down her back as I wrapped a bit around my hand and pulled her back, kissing her lips passionately and I thrust into her. I grunted as I palmed the head of my cock while I closed my eyes and saw Bella's tight ass in my hands as I rammed my cock into her, my name falling from her lips like a chant as I made her come over and over again around me.

With a few more flicks of my wrist and some gentle tugging, I was coming quicker than I could ever remember, my hand firm on the tile wall as all of me disappeared down the drain and I turned off the water, feeling tired as all hell.

When I finally stepped out of the shower, I was quick to dry myself off and toss on a pair of boxers before climbing into bed, feeling both exhausted and relieved. I lay in bed with my eyes wide open, staring at a non-existent spot on the ceiling as my mind kept wandering back to the kiss in the bookstore, and it soon crept into my dreams.

I walked into The Bookshelf and an uneasy feeling hit me as I listened to the bell over the door ring loudly. "What are you doing here man?" asked Jasper, who was sitting in his favorite stool behind the counter typing away on his computer. I shrugged my shoulders, a little unsure of why I was there and moved over towards the counter to see him. He hadn't called me to come in and see him, or even to work a few hours to help him out, so I was appropriately confused. Then again, couldn't I just stop in whenever the hell I felt like it? "Whatever, it doesn't matter why you are here, but can you do me a huge favor and cover for me? I have something I desperately need to do."

"Seriously?" I croaked out incredulously as I eyed him tentatively, until I heard the clacking of heels against the hardwood floor. Alice came out from the back room, clutching a couple of books and quirked her eye brow at me. "Don't you mean there is someone you desperately need to do?" I corrected him with a sly grin.

"Great. Is Edward here to cover for you? I'm literally dying to get out of this musty old place," she said casually as I looked around the store, wondering what the hell was going on. I felt like I was looking at a scene from the outside in, because before I even had a chance to respond to Alice and Jasper, they were walking out the door of the shop into the darkened night, wishing me good luck as the bell over the door rang around me.

"Don't forget to lock up after closing," Jasper called as he waved haplessly and continued down the street and away from my sight. I was pretty fucking pissed. I had come in here for god knows what reason and now I was watching his damned store while he went off to fuck his girlfriend? How is this fair?

"Shit," I cursed loudly as I threw my hand a little too forcefully against the counter, cutting my finger against a chipped piece of the countertop. "Fuck. What the hell else could go wrong now?"

I went to the bathroom and washed my hand in the small sink, the blood falling onto the white porcelain as I then found Jasper's first aid kit under the counter. I rinsed the mess off my finger and patted it dry with a paper towel before I wrapped a small band aid around the cut. When I looked down at my middle finger, I couldn't help but groan, feeling like a complete idiot.

I sat down on the stool and was about to start surfing porn on the internet, when I heard a small thud, which sounded like a book hitting the floor. Great, was the place fucking haunted too? I thought I was alone, thus the decision to play on the internet. _Hmm… I wonder if Penny would be online to play with me? _I shook the thought from my head and made my way down each aisle looking for the cause of the noise, finding a very unexpected sight before me.

There bent over in the middle of the aisle was Bella, her ass high in the air as I noticed her luscious looking cheeks peeking at me from under their tight denim confines. She was dressed in the exact same outfit she'd had on the very first day I saw her in Common Grounds. The tight t-shirt, red and white striped socks pulled up to her knees and the awkward looking rain boots were making a comeback as well as the bright yellow rain coat.

"Can I help you with something?" I asked, catching her off guard. She dropped the book she was holding again and when she picked it up, she moved so slowly that I couldn't help but stare at her long lean legs which appeared to be tanned to perfection. I also couldn't stop staring at her as she slid the book back into place on the shelf and ambled over towards me, her hand reaching up and moving gently across my chest, then over my shoulder and down my back. Her gentle hands leaving a trail of goose bumps behind them under my t-shirt.

"I may have something that you could help with Edward," she said seductively as she turned the corner and walked down another aisle, leaving me a breathless mess with my feet glued to the floor. I wanted to move, I really did. I wanted to know what she was doing, but my body was frozen. "Are you going to come for me Edward?"

_Fuck Yes!_

I suddenly began moving, my feet stepping heavily down each aisle as I looked for her, hearing her voice echo around the small, dusty shop. As much as I loved Jasper, I made a mental note to remind him to get a decent cleaning service in here when I went I talked to him next.

When I turned the corner to walk down the last aisle, which ironically was filled with historical romances, Bella was leaning up against the shelves, one foot perched behind her as she looked at me with dark eyes and a lustful gaze. She strolled towards me and in a rather bold move, even for her, she began palming my cock through the fabric of my khaki shorts as I groaned loudly from having her touch me. God, how I had dreamed of this moment so many times, but having it happen to me, was unlike anything I expected. Bella stood up on her tip toes and her lips wrapped around my ear lobe and she sucked furiously, my entire body trembling in excitement.

"I want you," she whispered sexily as I groaned again and her lips grazed down my jaw slowly. "Here in the store Edward."

I froze; surprised by the words that fell from her lips, as though she was desperate to speak them. Before I even had a chance to register her words, I was grasping her hips firmly in my hands as I turned her around so that she was facing the shelves and I moved forward, making Bella move with me until her hands were gripping the shelves and my now aching dick was pressed firm against her ass.

"Bell…" I began to say before her hand rose up and her small fingers pressed firmly against my lips. I couldn't help but kiss them sweetly, wanting for this not to be some quick fuck in Jasper's bookstore. Hell, if I could have my way, we'd be high tailing it back to my apartment where I would make love to her all night long, but she seemed to have different ideas.

"No talking. Just fucking."

_What the hell?_

I was about to respond when Bella suddenly pushed herself back against my straining cock, moving slowly as she made the growing tightness in my shorts even worse. Her body turned slightly as she used one hand to unbutton my shorts and then tug on the zipper, watching them puddle to the floor at my feet. I opened my mouth but nothing came out, as I found myself desperate to follow her rules and not speak. Instead, I let out a low groan as I grabbed Bella's hip again and turned her around, facing the books again, as my hands wrapped around her till I found the button on her indecent jean shorts.

My fingers lazily traced circles on her smooth skin beneath the waistband of her shorts as I then pulled the zipper down and began to tug the denim roughly from her body. The moment I heard the fabric hit the floor, I grabbed the back of her hideous rain coat and pulled it from her, throwing it on the other side of the aisle as I stared at her, looking sexy as fuck in her knee high socks, tiny thong underwear and tight white t-shirt. I could see the black lace of her bra beneath the shirt and I growled possessively. _Fuck, I wanted her._

I was quick to drop to my knees and grab the small scrap of black lace that she claimed were panties. I slowly pulled them from her body, sliding them down her luscious thighs as her sweet musky scent completely surrounded me. Once Bella had stepped out of them, I pushed them aside and grabbed her left ankle, lifting her foot till I could put it to rest on the second shelf from the ground, effectively leaving her open completely for me.

I reached up, feeling a little tentative, and ran one finger slowly around her clit. Fuck, she was dripping wet.

_She was wet for ME._

"Jesus fuck Edward," she panted breathlessly, as I looked up and saw her knuckles turning white as she held onto the shelf in front of her for dear life. "More."

I quickly agreed to her request and placed my face back between her thighs as I extended my tongue out and licked her softly. Fuck, the first taste was always the sweetest, but with Bella, I had a feeling it would always be this good. I only wished I would have a chance to find out… repeatedly. I stretched my tongue out as far as I could go, and began lapping at her fiercely, eager to taste every inch of her. I could hear Bella's panting and groans as I felt my own cock, still confined by my boxer shorts, aching more than ever.

It was a little uncomfortable and when I adjusted myself, I turned my head slightly, giving me a better angle to her as I spread her lips open. I plunged my tongue inside of her, feeling her clinch around my mouth as I then scraped my teeth gently on her clit, teasing her. "Fuck yes… more, more, more," she pleaded with me as I pulled myself from her and blew a deep breath along her wetness, making her legs shiver. Deciding to surprise her, I thrust two fingers inside of her as my thumb found purchase on her clit and I pressed firmly, desperate to have her unravel around my fingers.

"Such long… oh my god… long fucking fingers," she cursed out as I smirked beneath her and pushed further inside of her wetness, curling my fingers, her moans and screams spurring me on. "Fuck me."

_God, how I wanted to fuck her._

I found it very difficult not to speak to Bella as I finger fucked her into oblivion. I eagerly wanted to tell her how good she tasted, like the sweetest honey. I wanted to beg her to tell me what she wanted, what she liked me to do, but I was restrained, and it was almost as uncomfortable as my cock at that moment. "Harder, deeper," she begged me as I did as she requested, my index and middle finger buried inside her as deep as they could go. I picked up speed and began gently kissing the inside of her thighs, which was her undoing.

I felt her entire body tense as she yelled out my name and released around my fingers. I shoved them both in my mouth and took a moment to lick them clean, before I realized Bella was now on the floor with me, her legs straddling mine as she pressed against me, her bare warmth against my covered cock. She ground her hips down onto me, making me groan lowly through clenched teeth, as I felt her wetness against me.

"I need you inside of me Edward," she said as I looked up at her eyes and saw something there, but I wasn't sure what it was. She grasped my face in her hands and kissed me fervently, her tongue exploring every inch of my mouth as she tasted herself on me. It didn't seem to turn her off at all, which was what I expected, so I decided to get a bit bold and I slipped my fingers back inside her wet folds. When I pulled them out and offered them to her, Bella quirked her eye brow for a moment before sucking them into her mouth. Her tongue worked languidly around my fingers… licking, teasing and tasting every inch of them as I rolled my eyes back in my head, suddenly envisioning her doing that to my cock.

"Stand up," she said a moment later, catching me off guard, yet again. She climbed from my lap and grasped the hem of her shirt, pulling it off over her head swiftly. Bella tossed it in a pile with her bright yellow rain coat and then made quick work of my own shirt, adding it to the mess of clothes that littered the floor of Jasper's now dark shop. I reached one hand up to cup her cheek and pull her in for a kiss, as Bella grabbed the waist band of my boxers and tugged them down in one quick movement. So much for being a gentle attentive lover, I thought to myself as I let out a loud moan as I felt Bella's hand wrap around my length.

"Oh fuck… so fucking thick," she groaned excitedly as I looked down and saw my cock grasped firmly in her hands, which made my dick twitch and I had to fill my mind with several graphic non-sexual images so that I didn't lose my shit in her hand two seconds after she touched me.

I had to stifle a small laugh when I heard the crinkling noise of a condom wrapper and I noticed Bella pulling one out from the top of her knee high sock. When the hell had that gotten there? I shook my head, too busy to be bothered with minor details as threw my head back, closing my eyes as she sheathed my cock and then began to suck on my collarbone. How the hell did she know I loved that?

I was instantly overcome with desire as I grabbed Bella's ass in my hands and lifted her from the floor, her legs wrapping themselves around my waist as I positioned myself at her entrance. "Oh god, you feel so fucking good," she said through clenched teeth. There was a bit of hesitation as I moved to slide inside of her, but Bella was desperate to have me in her and the feeling was mutual. She squeezed her legs tightly, pushing me further into her depths causing me to grunt loudly, my noises echoing around the musty store. "Don't fucking move," she said as I looked at her face, watching as she bit her lower lip and literally shook in my arms.

My hands remained literally glued to her firm ass cheeks as I followed her instructions, holding her tightly in my grasp as I remained buried in her. When she bent forward and kissed me, her lips moving against my furiously, I took it as a signal and began to fuck her as hard as I could, her back pressed firmly against the shelves as she groaned and moaned, egging me on.

"Jesus Fuck… you listen so well Edward, I love it." I growled as she leaned forward and bit my neck, her lips then sucking on the same spot as I pistoned my shaft inside her soaking cunt. I had to bite my own lip to keep from calling out to her, telling her how good she felt wrapped around me, even better than my wildest fucking fantasies, which would never be able to live up to this. _EVER._

"Edward, harder," she panted breathlessly as she wrapped her arms around my neck firmly, her legs still in place, gripping my waist. I grasped the shelves behind her with one hand, my other holding tight onto her supple ass as I fucked her as hard as I could. Several books were falling off the shelves around us as our pants and grunts filling the air. "Oh fuck yes… I'm almost… oh god… almost there."

I felt Bella's entire body tense in my arms, her legs like a vise grip around me as she came, screaming my name loudly as she squeezed tightly. Bella began milking my cock as I spilled into her following two more thrusts, my forehead landing on her shoulder as I tried to regulate my breathing. I shivered as I felt Bella's soft hands thread through my hair lovingly. _God, how I want to be loved by this exquisite and sexy woman._

"Gah… that was just…" she said, unable to form a coherent sentence, which made me smirk since it was my dick that did that to her. I quirked an eye brow at her, silently asking if I could speak and when she nodded her head slowly, I walked towards the small table at the back of the store, with her naked body still wrapped around me. I gently sat her down on the edge of the cold wooden table and kissed her reverently, unable to think of something to say that was worthy of this goddess.

"You are fucking spectacular," I admitted, feeling a bit like those words were not enough. "Absolutely perfect."

"Thanks," she said with a small blush as I leaned in and kissed her again, wanting to show her with more than words that she was special and wanted. As I bent down to pick up her clothes from the floor, not wanting her to catch cold from sitting in Jasper's store buck naked, with the exception of her knee high socks, I heard the ringing of the bell. "Who the fuck would come in the store now? It's fucking closed and I'm not quite done with you."

Unfortunately for me, the ringing wouldn't stop and then it turned into obnoxious buzzing and I found myself opening my eyes and groaning as I reached out and smacked my alarm clock, finally turning it off. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and sat up, my morning wood practically staring at me in the face. I let out a huge groan and ran my hands down my face.

Why the fuck does this only happen in my dreams?

**A/N: Yes, we do have more outtakes planned for this story, so make sure to alert or favorite this bad boy!**


	2. The Beginning

**Thanks to the efforts of MsKathy for arranging the Haiti Relief efforts, ****and of course to all of you who donated.**** This was our little one-shot contribution which highlights how our PennyLane84 and Paperback_Writer initially met. Enjoy!**

**We don't own Twilight; we just give them silly pennames and make them even more confused than they normally are. **

**EPOV**

I sat around and looked at my soon to be former room, a little twinge of sadness coursing through me. There were boxes piled up on either side of the room and just a few articles of clothing hanging up in my empty closet. It was really about time that I moved out of the apartment I had been sharing with Jasper & Emmett, but it was bittersweet regardless. I was finally moving into my own apartment on Saturday after searching long and hard for the perfect one for me. I ended up finding a decent place that was in the village, which was able to accommodate the small darkroom I wanted.

Jasper and Emmett were disappointed when I finally told them it was time for me to grow up and leave the nest. Emmett, of course, was the most dramatic about the entire thing and broke into a warbled version of 'Sunrise, Sunset', in which the lyrics he sang were incorrect until he reached the chorus. I had simply rolled my eyes at the time and Jasper did the same before pretending to beg me to let him move in with me. Once more glance around the room showed me that the only thing currently plugged in were one beside lamp, my alarm clock and my trusty laptop, which sat perched on my legs as I leaned up against my headboard.

Tomorrow was my last night here and the boys and I were planning to do it up right at our usual hangout 'The Brass Monkey,' but tonight Jasper had to put in a late night at his store doing inventory and Emmett was doing some sort of film; probably a porno, I scoffed to myself quietly as I looked down at my computer screen again and decided to look up some new songs on iTunes.

After twenty minutes of downloading some Beatles songs to finish up my collection, and then syncing my iPod so I could start listening, I surfed on over to Entertainment Weekly's website to check out music and movie news, and that was where my night and subsequently my life, took a turn for the interesting. I stumbled my way into a chat room that was discussing the music of the Beatles and quickly got embroiled in a rather heated discussion with someone named PennyLane84, clearly an enthusiast like me, and PaulIzDed, who was not.

_PaulIzDed: Hello… am I the only one who thinks the Beatles are overrated? Even Paul McCartney claims most people only know him as that guy from Rock Band._

_PennyLane84: Sacrilege *holds up fingers in mock sign of the cross* How old are you Paul? Cause no one over the age of 21 would say anything like that._

I smiled at the first question offered by PennyLane84 because that was exactly what I was thinking. I then began thinking how nice it was to find someone who shared my view on the Beatles. Emmett and Jasper preferred more modern music, and not to knock their tastes, but I could only handle so much Eminem in one day before I wanted to kill myself in the most brutal of ways.

_PaulIzDed: 18_

_Paperback_Writer: If I may interject, Paul does have a valid point that to today's generation, the Beatles are probably better known for their foray into video games through Rock Band. However, if you have played once on that stupid game, you would know how fucking awesome they were._

_PennyLane84: Rock Band, Schmock Band. It doesn't matter one bit, in my opinion. The Beatles are iconic, timeless and everyone between the ages of 10 and 80 should know this._

_PaulIzDed: The best thing about the Beatles… most of them are dead!_

_PennyLane84: Any chance you are in NYC Paul so I can come and kick your ass?_

I actually let out a laugh at this comment and then smiled again. She lived in NYC. Hmmm… that was interesting. Dude, are you really swooning over a girl you have only argued alongside with in a chat room about music for five minutes? I thought about this for a moment before finally just letting out a sigh because apparently I was.

_PaulIzDed: hahahaha like I would tell you where I lived. You are one crazy bitch right?_

_PennyLane84: Yes, yes I am. So who do you think is the best band ever Paul?_

_PaulIzDead: Metallica._

I let out a loud groan that echoed through my empty room and I was relieved that no one was home. Emmett would most certainly knock on the door and accuse me of jerking off, which wasn't the case for once. I was just dealing with the musically incompetent and that tended to frustrated me beyond belief.

_Paperback_Writer: Jesus H. Christ. Are you serious? Wait… did you hear that? John Lennon just turned over in his grave_

_PaulIzDed:Yes, I am serious as fuck. Lars Ulrich and James Hetfield are musical geniuses._

_PennyLane84: Didn't they have to put an ad in the paper to get members? How fucking lame._

_PaulIzDed: Well they didn't have newspapers back in the 1800's or whenever the fuck the Beatles were formed. Metallica as sold like 50 million albums, you can't discount numbers like that._

_Paperback_Writer: Yes I can, cause those people have bad taste in music. Let me guess… you also like bands like Limp Bizkit, Megadeth, Guns and Roses and shit like that right?_

_PennyLane84: You know what was great about the Beatles? They knew when to quit! Metallica should take the hint._

_PaulIzDed: Fuck You._

_Paperback_Writer: Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?_

_PennyLane84: LOL. Nice one PBW._

I smiled again at the new little nickname she had assigned me and then leaned back against my bed again. This was getting ridiculous. Reign yourself in there Cullen, she's probably in her sixties and saw the Beatles when they first appeared on the Ed Sullivan Show, I told myself. I shook the thought from my head and tried to focus on the fact that she and I enjoyed the Beatles. I could always use a new friend right?

It was only about twenty minutes later that PaulIzDed left the room after Penny and I both annihilated his taste in music. A few other random chatters also tossed in their two cents regarding the situation, but Paul took the brunt of our frustration. When everything was said and done, I had a great time chatting with PennyLane84 and I was truly looking forward to talking to her again - if I was lucky enough to catch her in the chat room again - even if it was just about the Beatles.

**BPOV**

Walking into the coffee shop, the sweet scent of freshly ground coffee filled the air, which was definitely appropriate considering the place was called 'Common Grounds.' It was my safe place, my happy place. It was always where I went when I needed a boost, one, because I was a complete, total, undeniable coffee addict, and two, it was only a few steps from my apartment. Rain or shine, I was at Common Grounds every morning like clockwork.

I ordered my usual Café Latte with extra foam, saying a quick hello to the new girl, Margaret, who seemed like the type of person who could handle grumpy people who haven't had their coffee yet. I could definitely be one of those people if someone got in the way of me and this old coffee shop. The look she gave me last week when she first started definitely said 'yell at me just because you're cranky in the morning, and I WILL cut you.' However, the look I countered with hers said 'just hand me the coffee and no one gets hurt.' Needless to say, Margaret and I got along pretty well.

I paid for my coffee and stepped into the mild yet windy April air, deciding that it was warm enough to go for a walk in the park. That was one of the perks of being an artist. I didn't have a schedule, no one telling me that I had to be anywhere at a certain time, and that morning, it was just my coffee and I, happy as we could be. However, being an artist definitely took a toll on the finances, and I really did need to look into getting a steady-ish job. Steady never really worked for me, routines weren't exactly my cup of tea. Then again, I was a coffee girl to begin with.

Just as I made my way into the park, a loud barking caught my attention, and before I knew it, my sacred cardboard cup was flying out of my hand and my ass was on the ground. I squeezed my eyes shut, preparing to be mauled, when all of a sudden hot breath warmed my face. I opened my eyes tentatively and saw the cutest, not to mention biggest, German Shepherd I had ever seen.

"Aro! What did… I'm so sorry, miss. He didn't hurt you, did he? He's really harmless," called a woman's voice from above me. I looked up and saw a middle-aged woman and a man of about the same age running towards me and my newfound friend. I smiled at the goof ball of a dog in front of me, his tongue hanging out the side of his mouth, two inches from my face. I smiled at him and petted his head, which in turn caused him to close his eyes in contentment.

I looked up and the woman I assumed was his owner and stood up, wiping whatever dirt managed to get on my ass. "It's fine, I'm a sucker for dogs and as long as he didn't bite my head off, he's all good I my book," I said as I reached down and patted the enormous dog's head again. He seemed friendly enough.

"Oh, good. Thank god you don't want to sue us like the last woman did," said the man who bent down and refastened Aro's leash. I giggled a little at his statement, because people really would do anything for money. "I'm Alec, and this is my wife, Jane," he said as he reached out his hand for me to shake.

"Bella, it's nice to meet you," I told them, shaking both their hands and trying to be reassuring with my words to let them know that I was not angry or planning to sue them just because their dog was a bit of a handful. It seemed like he just needed someone to look after him.

This rather interesting encounter was how I ended up in Washington Square Park the following week being dragged, literally, by Aro the Great. What had I gotten myself into?! Walking someone's dog three times a week for money, yeah really awesome idea, Swan. I swear, if this dog got off of his leash and ran away again, only to get hit by a car or lost or something equally horrific, I was definitely just going to sue the next couple whose dog knocked me and my precious coffee to the ground.

"Aro, HEEL, GODDAMMIT!" I shouted as he continued his impossibly fast pace around the park. It was like the beast had never heard a command before in his life. The passersby, or maybe they were just standing still, I wasn't really paying much attention, gawked at me like I was some lunatic who couldn't handle a freakin' dog. Well… they wouldn't be very far off, would they?

He finally stopped in his tracks by a giant, shady tree and stood there, happily wagging his tail, which was of course whacking me in the leg with each pass. I sat down cautiously, hoping that he'd found a spot where we could both just sit and relax, which thankfully we did for a good half hour. Once that was over, he dragged – I mean, I walked him, back to Alec and Jane's place and told them it went well. I was going to tame that damn dog if it was the last thing I did.

I walked into my apartment and up the stairs to my bedroom, stripping out of my dirty clothes and changing into my comfy pajama pants and an old t-shirt. I logged onto my computer and went onto the Entertainment Weekly website, hoping to see the guy known as Paperback_Writer there again. Well, at least I hoped it was a guy, preferably in his twenties, oh and would it be too much to ask if we could maybe throw in a firm jaw line, too with some extra stubble…

"Ah! Focus, Bella," I chastised myself.

I entered the chat room, and saw that he was already in there advising someone who was apparently a nineteen year old college student, to acquire some real taste in music. I laughed, because it seemed like it would be our daily responsibility to persuade people of all ages to listen to the Beatles. Yeah, we were both equally obsessed, it seemed.

_PennyLane84: Hey there… again. Were you successful in bringing your friend over to the psychedelic side?_

Okay, that may have been a little lame, but I really just wanted to talk to him again. Oh, please let it be a him. Twenties. Firm jaw.

_Paperback_Writer: I sure as hell hope so… she claimed she was on her way to go download some Beatles tunes, asking me which ones were the best. I'm not too hopeful though… she claimed she had never heard 'Here Comes the Sun.' Who the hell has never heard that song?!_

_PennyLane84: That's just strange. I knew that damn song before I knew who the hell sang it. It was the beginning of my Beatle-obsessed life LOL._

_Paperback_Writer: Mine was 'Yellow Submarine.' I swear I'm still scarred by the Blue Meanies. I mean seriously, how freaking creepy can one cartoon get?_

_PennyLane84: OH MY GOD! Me too! I will forever resent my mother for making me watch that. _

_Paperback_Writer: Fuck, I think our mothers met in some sort of 'how to scar your child for life' chat room. Had they had chat rooms back then… you know what I mean._

_PennyLane84: I know exactly what you mean, actually. We make quite the pair, PBW._

_Paperback_Writer: That we do, PL._

I laughed at the whole ridiculousness of our conversation, especially the fact that we'd both been subjected to and scarred by the Yellow Submarine cartoon. A second later my phone buzzed. It was a text from Alice, telling me to get my 'quirky little ass' to her store in the next ten minutes or she was going to sell the top she'd been holding for me for two weeks. I rolled my eyes and told her I'd be right there.

_PennyLane84: Do you have roommates? I envy you if you don't, because mine just love to nag._

_Paperback_Writer: Actually, I just moved into my own apartment, so I know what you mean about nagging roommates. Actually, my roommates were just plain old crazy._

_PennyLane84: Well, mine are demanding my attention at the moment, so I'm afraid I'll have to cut our 'whose mom scarred who more' contest a little bit short._

_Paperback_Writer: I understand, PL. I'll see you around._

_PennyLane84: Definitely. I might be back here… say tomorrow. Around 3._

I smiled and shook my head at my obvious attempt at talking to him again the next day, mostly considering I never really initiated relationships.

_Paperback_Writer: Well, I might be here around then also. See ya._

_PennyLane84: See ya PBW._

That was how PBW and I started our almost daily chats. Now we talked in a private room, because we both got sick and tired of people questioning our love for the Beatles. I finally tamed Aro, and it only took a little over a month to do. We now walked with three other dogs, all of which were much easier to get used to than Aro had been, but he was still my favorite goofball. Business was booming and I could finally afford socks without holes.

However, days like today where it was expected to be raining buckets outside meant that I had the day off from dog walking. I grudgingly got out of bed, not wanting to face the wet May atmosphere, but needing a cup of coffee even more. I threw on my yellow rain slicker with matching hat, a pair of shorts, my favorite Woodsy the Owl t-shirt, striped knee socks and blue rain boots, before I headed out the door towards Common Grounds.


	3. I Will

**FLB11: Shocked to see us again, aren't ya?**

**CPW: They shouldn't be, since we said we had outtakes coming.**

**FLB11: Oh don't ruin my fun. This chapter is for the lovely and swino, who graciously purchased us in the recent FGB Auction.**

**CPW: They asked for more fuckery involving the mothers, which we were more than happy to write. I am a little envious though, since these girls get to meet in a few days and FLB11 and I have never met.**

**FLB11: You'll stalk me one day.**

**CPW: I'll show up at your college grad and shock the crap out of you. I'll even drag our wonderful beta MaggieMay14 with me!**

**FLB11: Stop threatening me. Now, without further adieu…. The MIFFY Wedding!**

**CPW: Oh… don't forget. We don't own the characters, we all know who does. However, if we owned them, they would certainly be funnier and less asexual! **

**BPOV**

You know how people always talk about the adoring look on a mother's face the first time she sees her daughter in her wedding dress?

Well, judging by the way Renee was looking at me when I stepped out of the fitting room in my layered blue gown, I didn't think we were doing it right. Her face was all screwed up, the small groove in between her eyebrows spoke her confusion, and she hadn't even uttered a word. My stomach churned because Esme hadn't even arrived at the shop yet and if my mother hated it, like I was certain she did, I didn't even want to consider what Esme was going to think.

I shook the images out of my head of my future mother-in-law fainting and then when she came to she quickly rescinded her offer to pay for the dress. A girl had to at least hope that this wouldn't turn out as badly as I thought it would, right?

"Uhh… I know it's a little untraditional, but as soon as I tried it on for the first time, I just saw it as blue. I wanted it to match my ring, and I know Edward will love it, so-"

"The color isn't what's bothering me, Bella," my mother said, her eyes still trained on the dress.

"Really?" I asked incredulously. I glanced toward the mirror, and I saw nothing that was visibly wrong with the dress. The long, tiered layers were flowing gorgeously, and the blue was shining more brightly than I could have ever imagined. However, I braced myself for what my mother was going to come up with regarding what she was seeing.

"It looks… frumpy," she finally said.

"_Frumpy_? You think I look frumpy? Of all the things I could have imagined that you'd say, 'frumpy' would probably be the absolute last thing on that list." I could have sworn I saw my mother visibly shrink in front of me. I must have looked scary, and I certainly did feel frightening. "I mean, look at these shoulders," I said, running my hands over each shoulder and continuing down my arm. "And this," I pointed to my cleavage, "this is totally frump-less. In fact, it's probably the least conservative thing that I could get away with at a family wedding."

Okay, so that last part was a complete lie, but I just couldn't get past the fact that she thought I looked like some kind of grandmother or something. This was my mother that was speaking, right? I didn't even know the word 'frumpy' existed in her vocabulary.

"It's just… you are so quirky and outgoing Bella. This dress doesn't seem like you."

"What part of this dress doesn't say quirky, mom? It's blue for god sakes. I mean, I could be like one of those crazies from the Academy Awards and be dressed like a Swan, ironic, I know."

"And I love those shades of blue, don't get me wrong. I just feel like you are going to prom honey, not your wedding."

Just then, Esme barreled into the fitting room in a bright pink Chanel suit, and as if the universe turned into a giant pointing finger and was taunting me, she spoke. "Oh my goodness, Bella! Those bridesmaids' dresses are absolutely gorgeous! You didn't have to model it for us. You and Rosalie must be the same size. I can't wait to see your dress. I bet it's fantastic!"

I really wanted to dig a hole into the floor, burrow my way back onto the street and away from these two insane women. If Edward and I thought they were bad now, we were slowly beginning to realize that it only got worse. They would certainly be footing the bill for a marriage therapist if Edward and I ever needed one. I let out an exasperated sigh before I broke the news to her.

"Um, Esme, this is my wedding dress," I said, immediately squeezing my eyes shut, in preparation for the worst possible scenario, and counting my breaths until she said something. Anything would have been nice since I had already reached twenty-five breaths. "Esme?" I squeaked. I slowly opened one eye and saw that she was looking back and forth between my mother and the dress. Renee was just shrugging her shoulders, as if to say that she had absolutely nothing to do with what I was standing before them wearing.

"It's blue," she finally said. "Why on god's green earth is her wedding dress blue?" she asked as she looked at my mother in disbelief.

"I like the color Esme, but the dress is just so… boring."

"Oh I get it… I'm being punked, like on that show right?" Suddenly Esme began to adjust her suit jacket so that she looked impeccable, not that she didn't already, and her eyes flashed around the room. "Where are the cameras? Where is that youngest Demi Moore married? I swear Renee, she got it right marrying such a young stud. I bet he can go all night long. Carlisle usually needs to take a break when…"

"No! No more!" I shouted loudly, desperate to interrupt Esme before she continued on yet another rant about her sex life with Carlisle. These people were about to become my in-laws and I desperately didn't want to hear about what was going on in private. Hell, I didn't even like hearing that shit about Alice & Rosalie.

"Bella, get serious," Esme said with her hands perched on her hips as she continued to look around for some sort of sign that she was on a reality show. "This isn't your dress. You wouldn't… its blue and well, Renee is right. I always pictured you in something more elegant, detailed… lots of lace and layers."

"It has layers," I replied snidely as I pointed my hands down my dress, reminding her of the several layers that made up my dress.

"They aren't poufy enough. I thought the dress would be more like… more like Princess Diana. I said money was no object in choosing your gown, Bella."

"Esme are you kidding me? Princess Diana? The train on her dress was like twenty five feet long. She was royalty. I'm a damn artist and coffee shop owner from the village. This is my wedding and I will not have either of you speaking ill of my dress. Do you hear me?" I snapped and both mothers nodded their head slowly in response.

"Do you think maybe you can try something else on?" Esme suggested with a sweet smile on her face.

I groaned and ran a hand over my face to prepare myself because I knew these women were not yet finished. However, if I didn't calm down a bit, I would not be able to be held responsible for my actions. I would probably explode if they got carried away and there would be satin, lace and random body parts flying everywhere. I could already see the newscasters on the evening news talking about the Manhattan Bridal Salon massacre.

Although that image was appealing, I felt resolute about my decision regarding my dress. It was my wedding after all, not theirs.

"No. The wedding is almost here. I am not trying on a new dress to please you."

"But… why blue, Bella? It's so sad. This is the happiest day of your life, right?"

"I'm not really sure that I can give you a good answer to that question, Esme. I tried the dress on and something was missing. I looked down at my ring, and all of a sudden, I knew that I wanted my dress to match. I know it's, well… weird, but I know that Edward is going to love it."

"You know, Esme, it's not the fact that it's blue, but just look at those ruffles. She looks like a flapper," Renee added, though she wasn't being helpful. I was actually kind of shocked that they both disliked the dress so much.

"Weren't those girls kind of risqué in the 30's?" Esme asked, whispering to make sure that no one could hear her, but of course everyone did since Esme had no volume to her voice.

"I think it was the 20's, and those dresses were completely unflattering," my mother said, nodding her head to me. It was like she was telling me that my dress looked horrible on me, and if I hadn't been so pissed off, I might have started crying.

"Okay, now listen up, both of you," I said, stepping down from the podium and carefully picking up the dress so I didn't trip. "I love this dress. Edward is going to adore this dress, because it matches the ring that _you_ gave him." I pointed at Esme accusingly. "I invited the two of you here as a courtesy, mostly because my fiancé kept telling me how much his mother wanted to see me in my dress before the day of our wedding."

Each of the women was staring at me like two deer caught in the headlights of an 18-wheeler.

"There will be no poufy dresses. I will not be trying anything else on, and if you don't like it, too bad. This dress is couture! Hell, the designer dyed it for me and loved the concept. It's not like I did this in a bucket in my backyard and prayed for the best like Renee used to do with her tie dyed t-shirt collection." I paused for a moment and took a deep breath as I gathered my courage. "Now, Esme, I want to thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for paying for this dress. It means more to me than I could ever hope to express in words, but the dress is mine all the same. This is the dress I am wearing, and nothing that either of you say is going to falter the confidence that I have in my choice. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm having a little trouble breathing, so I'm going to take this thing off and get the seamstress to let it out a little. Or maybe a lot."

I walked out of the room and back behind the curtain as the seamstress began taking my measurements again so it didn't feel like I was caught in Emmett's vice grip.

Neither one of them said anything unpleasant about my dress again, at least not in my presence.

A few weeks and one more successful dress fitting later, I found myself standing in front of the mirror in the bedroom, dressed for our rehearsal dinner at the Washington Square Hotel. I was in a simple black dress that stopped just short of my knee, and my hair was clipped behind my ears, flowing in long curls down my back.

Our rehearsal earlier in the day had gone smoothly, which was a miracle in and of itself, but I had a nagging feeling that it was the universe warning me that things wouldn't go as smoothly for the actually ceremony. I wrinkled my nose at just the thought of what could happen.

I was in the middle of a horrific daydream in which Charlie stepped on my dress, tearing the back out of it which caused me to fall flat on my face onto the floor, my underwear showing to every one of our guests, when Edward's voice interrupted the unspeakable things happening in my head.

"Bella?" I heard Edward call from the living room. I did a quick spin around in the mirror to make sure there was nothing sticking out or out of place. I shook away my earlier vision and practically sashayed into the room to find Edward fiddling with his tie. It was quite an adorable sight, actually. "Can you help me with this tie? It isn't very cooperative tonight."

I chuckled lightly as I stepped in front of him and fixed his tie. I was suddenly thankful that I'd learned how to tie a tie properly from Rosalie in college, because up until Edward, there was no one in my life that needed me to tie one for him.

"There you go. Perfect," I said as I straightened the top near the collar. I looked up and saw Edward staring at me, and his eyes were blazing. "What?"

"Bella, you look… amazing." He bent down and placed what I'm sure was meant to be a quick peck on the lips, but soon turned into a time consuming, lipstick smudging, make out session.

I pushed him away as soon as I felt his hardness press against my stomach. "Whoa, there. Tell Edward junior to calm down before it's too late. We have a dinner to get to, remember?"

He smiled his evilly good looking smile at me and placed a soft kiss just below my ear. It wasn't enticing, it wasn't teasing, it was just Edward. "How could I forget?" he whispered in my ear. I wasn't sure if it was his intention or not, but I swore I actually felt my knees weaken with his simple answer. It was completely ridiculous, but I had learned a while ago that the things Edward did to me often were. Which was exactly why I was marrying him.

"Yeah, well, it wouldn't be hard for me to forget anything while you're on me like that. So let's go," I said as I grabbed his tie and plucked his suit jacket from the couch before heading out the door with Edward in tow. Literally.

The hotel was a few blocks away from our apartment, but neither of us really felt like walking, so we decided to take a cab. However, we were surprised to find a car and driver waiting outside on the curb for us when we stepped outside. The driver explained that Mrs. Esme Cullen has requested he pick us up and I glared at Edward, but he just smiled and shrugged his shoulders. He clearly wasn't aware of this little turn of events either.

"I guess that's one of the benefits of having a mother who is used to high class society standards, no?"

"I swear, Edward, she and your father better not ever move to New York, because we both know that they will send a car after us everywhere we go. And then I might just have to kill her before we even have the chance to give her any grandchildren."

"Do you have any idea how cute you are when you get mad at my mother?" he asked as we ducked to get into the car. Thank god it wasn't anything overly fancy. I mean, we were only going a few blocks. "I'd say it was hot, because normally you're really hot when you're mad, but saying that you're hot when you're thinking about my mother just seems wrong to me."

"Ya think?" I said with a laugh. I leaned into his side and we enjoyed the ride to the hotel in comfortable silence.

When we arrived, Edward took my hand and gave it a tight squeeze and kissed my cheek sweetly. I quirked an eyebrow at him, because he was looking at me with apprehension, like he thought I was nervous or something. "What?" I asked.

"Nothing. I just figured I'd try to comfort you tonight, since this is probably the last time we'll be truly alone before we're married. It's not like Alice or Rosalie are going to let me anywhere near you tomorrow before the ceremony."

I forwent any concern I may have had regarding my lipstick and kissed him square on the lips. "You're sweet. Now let's go. I think I'm going to need a drink… or five if I have to deal with Alice, Rosalie and our mothers all in one room, and I want to get a head start."

Edward ran his hands over his face, in what I could only assume was pure anxiety. "I'll be right there with you. They'll probably cause an unstable environment."

"Oh my god, do you think the restaurant will actually implode? Are they insured for that kind of thing? What if they run out of alcohol? Could you imagine what would happen if Esme or Renee couldn't get their drink on?"

"I have no idea, but I am sure the hotel has enough liquor, Bella. Let's just drink as much as possible to dull our senses, but not too much, because a hangover is something that I definitely do not want to have on the day that I marry you. Just relax, okay?" He rubbed his hands up and down my arms soothingly, and I was calm within seconds.

We eventually got out of the car and walked into the gorgeous hotel lobby. It had marble floors and giant, elegant paintings adorned the walls in perfect fashion. We couldn't have found a better place for this night. It was stunning. There was a small room just off of the main restaurant already filled with an assortment of our closest family and friends, and as soon as she spotted us, I heard the telltale howl of Alice.

"You're here!" she screamed, running over to us and throwing her arms around us both at once. I wasn't sure if she was really drunk, or if this was the level of excitement that was normal for her on an occasion such as this. I decided that it was best I didn't know.

"Yeah, yeah, we're here. Our holograms were busy tonight, so we didn't really have a choice," I said once she untangled herself from around us. "But we're going to the bar now before anyone else can swarm around us. We'll be right back," I said, grabbing Edward's hand and making a beeline for the bar.

We had both received our drinks and when we turned around, we were spotted by the mothers. I gulped the rest of my martini and ordered another one. Edward and I were out of their sight as soon as the cold drink was in my hand.

We eventually mingled; Edward introduced me to some of his relatives who had flown in earlier in the day. He had warned me beforehand that most of them would be like his mother, only minus the dash of crazy. He was absolutely right, and we definitely had a good laugh about it as soon as we were alone for the few seconds they allowed.

We watched as Emmett made a huge, drunken fool of himself. Not that he needed the alcohol to do any of that for him, but it was entertaining all the same. We managed to avoid our mothers for most of the night, which hadn't been all that hard, considering that they were completely immersed in telling everyone they spoke to about what beautiful children Edward and I were going to have together. Six months ago, the idea of what they were telling everyone might have embarrassed us, but I think we were immune to it by that point. There's nothing like being humiliated every time you see your parents and future in-laws to make you totally unaffected by the concept of having children.

"So, what do you think about the room? Is it going to burst into flames any time soon?" Edward leaned down and whispered in my ear. Surprisingly, I was actually having a fantastic time, and I didn't think it was from the booze.

"You know, I don't think it will. It's probably a good thing we're not getting married in a church though. I'm pretty sure it might catch on fire if Esme or Renee entered the sanctity of a church. However, there's something about Renee and Esme's constant mortification-inducing mouths that make each time we spend with them easier. I know I just jinxed it and they're going to come up with all new ways to embarrass us, but tonight I don't care. Tonight is the day before I marry you, and there isn't anything or anyone in this world, or worse, in this room, that could embarrass me." I stood up on my toes and kissed him, sliding my tongue inside his wet mouth before quickly pulling away. "I love you, and I can't wait to marry you." Well, that had taken a more serious turn than I had anticipated, but I wouldn't take back anything I'd just said.

"I love you, too, Bella. You have no idea." He cupped the back of my head, threading his fingers through my hair, and probably messing it up pretty badly, but his hands could have been up my dress and I wouldn't have cared one bit. It didn't matter to me that we were literally standing in the middle of our rehearsal dinner, because as soon as Edward touched me, the whole room melted together in a blur. His lips descended on mine, enveloping me in the fierce kind of kiss and there was no way I was pulling away this time.

I felt Edward's other hand slide around my waist, pulling me closer to his warm body. I had a vague idea of where we were, so I had to keep reminding myself that hitching my leg up on his hip was wildly inappropriate. In the haze of our kisses, I managed to hear the distinct guffaw of what could only come from my mother.

"Oh, Emse, look! They're going to try and make us babies before dinner even starts!"

**EPOV**

As I stood at the altar, waiting patiently for Bella to appear, Emmett and Jasper stood behind me, Jasper as my best man and Emmett as my groomsman. My mother tried to pressure me into having my cousin Tanya and her husband Mike in the wedding, but it was better this way. Em & Jasper were my family more than Tanya ever was and my mother had to learn at some point that this wedding was about Bella and me, not her and her expectations.

The soft strains of "Better Together" by Jack Johnson surrounded me as I watched Parker, looking dapper in his little tiny tuxedo, as he walked down the aisle with his hands shaking as he nervously clutched the ring bearers' pillow. Beside him walked Emily, Margaret's almost two year old daughter, who was our flower girl and also easily distracted because she looked anywhere but towards where I stood and she dropped all her flower petals in her first attempt at the beginning of the aisle. Regardless, she looked absolutely adorable in her pale pink dress and pigtails.

My hands fidgeted front of me, though I was trying not to be too anxious because this was literally just a formality. Bella and I already belonged to each other because we had been together for so long, that really all that was missing was the legal documentation solidifying our relationship. When we had gotten engaged, we hadn't rushed to make any of our plans, and I told Bella, knowing full well how she used to feel about relationships as a whole, that if she didn't want to get married, I would be fine, as long as I had her. I even offered for us to go to Vegas, where she could wear old jeans and we could hit a drive thru wedding chapel, as long as it was official that she belonged to me and no one else. Little did I know, that she had actually dreamed of her own wedding since she was a child, so here I stood, about to fulfill her fantasy with over a hundred of our friends and family in attendance.

Bella and I had gone through so much to be here. Our first wedding location fell through, and I had to sweet talk some people at Bella's second location, the Lighthouse at Chelsea Piers, in order to get us in there. I still did some photography for weddings during the busy season, just for a little extra cash to help us pay for this wedding, so I offered a deal to all of their clients who wanted to use my services in order to get us in for an early May wedding. It was all worth it, after all the stress of the wedding, our jobs and the coffee shop, to finally be marrying the girl of my dreams.

When Parker and Emily finally reached the front of the rows, Renee ushered them into their seats beside her and Phil in the front row. The music continued as Rosalie then appeared in a knee length dress in fuchsia, followed by Alice in the same dress in purple. Jasper and Emmett both grew silent as they watched their wives do a little dance towards us, their hips sashaying from side to side in time to the music, as they clutched small bouquets of mini calla lilies with hints of muscari and wrapped in blue ribbon.

The girls all had the same flowers, and I had actually had a hand in picking them out, since Bella dragged me to the flower shop down the street from the coffee shop on a regular basis. She wanted me to be completely involved in the wedding planning, but when it truly came down to it, all I really did was help arrange the DJ, book the photographer and choose our wedding music. Hell, even my tuxedo had been her choice because she had hated the one I picked originally. Before our wedding, I already knew a fair amount about flowers thanks to my second life as a wedding photographer, but week after week of going in to Blossoms with Bella had been a bit tedious and taught me more about flowers than I could have possibly imagined.

The music changed drastically and "Forever" by Ben Harper filled the room. I lifted my head from my feet and was greeted by the most beautiful sight I had ever seen in my life. Bella was dressed in a beautiful multi colored blue gown, and I already knew to expect the unexpected with her. The dress, with its soft layers which draped to the floor, fit her like a glove and only served to emphasize her beauty more.

Charlie was at her side, beaming like a proud father, with her on his arm. Of course, I couldn't take my eyes off of Bella. She looked stunning with her hair swept up off her neck in a loose style that highlighted her beautiful skin and stunning eyes, which were not overdone. She looked… perfect. Just like I always imagined her on our wedding day.

When she reached the altar, Charlie handed her over to me with tears in the corners of his eyes as he kissed her softly on the cheek and attempted to compose himself. As I took her hands in mine, I knew we were always meant to be here – standing before our friends and family, pledging our eternal devotion. "You look beautiful," I whispered softly as Bella blushed gently and squeezed my hand tightly in hers.

"So do you." My smile grew bright at her small slip up. "Not beautiful, but handsome, you know. Shit, I'm rambling… and swearing. I'm sorry, I'm nervous." Quiet laughter erupted from our guests as Bella ran her hand down her face in embarrassment and the minister gave a quiet cough before launching into the ceremony.

As expected, because things never ran smoothly for us, there were a few small glitches. Parker dropped the ring pillow and one of the wedding bands fell under a chair and rolled three rows back, so we had to stop for a moment to get them. Jasper then smacked Emmett upside the head because it was him who insisted that Parker actually carry the real rings and Em bit his tongue, then let out a string of profanities that even made Renee blush.

Halfway through our vows, Emily insisted very loudly that she had to go to the bathroom and couldn't hold it in anymore. So, Margaret ran up to the front row and ushered her away, as the Minster attempted to proceed. Then, as we were reciting our rather heartfelt vows, Bella got a serious case of the hiccups and we had to have someone fetch her some water to try and ease them. Phil even tried to scare the hell out of her, but all it succeeded in doing was making a newly relived Emily cry her eyes out for a few minutes until she was soothed and we could continue.

However, despite the problems, I wouldn't have changed a single thing about our wedding ceremony. It was quirky, modern and different, but most of all it was honest. Bella and I were not perfect, and neither was our wedding. The reception was also far from ideal, though a fun time was had by all.

Everything began to change shortly after Bella and I finished our recessional to Ingrid Michaelson's "The Way I Am." The entire bridal party literally danced their way back down the aisle and when I went to hug my mother, she was completely red faced and there was mascara staining her eyes.

"Are you going to be alright?" Bella asked sweetly as my mother started to cry again and my father came to her side to console her.

"I'm just so happy for both of you. I never thought I would give my baby boy away to someone so wonderful."

"I'd offer him back to you, but I'm a little attached," Bella said with a laugh as she held up our entwined hands, showing off our wedding bands. I pulled my two favorite women into a huge hug and then Alice showed up to pry us apart, reminding us that we only had a few more minutes before we had to get ready for photos. "Go down to the reception and enjoy the open bar, Esme. I'm sure my mother will be right behind you. Oh and go touch up your makeup. Waterproof mascara is your friend, not a foe."

Bella and I spent the next hour having our photos done, as our family and friends enjoyed cocktails in the reception hall. I was a little particular, but our photographer was one of the staff photographers from the magazine and offered to do me a huge favor by taking them for us. I had complained repeatedly when I was in the office about how hard it was to find someone I could trust to do our pictures, and when he showed me his portfolio, I immediately snatched him up. It didn't hurt that he had won a few awards and accolades over the past few years for his work.

I knew from the moment the first photo was snapped that our pictures would be a perfect embodiment of Bella and me. They were playful, yet fitting. In a few of the pictures, the New Jersey skyline was behind us, glowing brightly across the Hudson River. Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper and Alice came down a little bit later and we took pictures standing under the altar all grouped together, along with Parker and Emily, who were both getting exhausted from the day long festivities. Bella and I had already had photos taken separately with our wedding party and parents before the ceremony, the guys and I choosing to get photos taken outside the building on the busy streets of Manhattan. After a few shots with our parents in a group, it was a relief to finally move on to the reception. I needed a drink.

When Bella and I walked into the reception hall to the sounds of "A Message" by Coldplay, after being announced by our DJ as Mr. and Mrs. Edward Cullen, it sounded so surreal. We danced ourselves towards the head table, passing the tables full of our family & friends, which were topped with the expansive centerpieces filled with various flowers in shades of blue, purple and fuchsia. There were sweeping views of the Hudson River behind us, and when I sat down, that was when I saw it.

My mother and Renee were standing against the bar doing shots, and there were several lined up in succession. This was not a good sign for the guests or the liquor supply. "It's starting," I whispered to Bella as she looked at me with curiosity and I pointed towards the bar area.

"Oh, don't stress, Edward. It's our wedding and we are their only children. Let them have a little fun. Plus, the sooner tonight is over, the quicker we can get to the honeymoon." Bella winked suggestively as her hand reached up high on my thigh and grazed my cock. If we hadn't just paid about thirty grand to get married, I would toss her over my shoulder and run back to our house to have my way with her. Sadly, I never got the chance to think about it since our appetizer was served a few minutes later and the DJ began playing some quiet music to fill the room through dinner.

After dinner and the heartfelt toasts made by Charlie, Carlisle, and a joint toast by Alice and Jasper, Bella and I finally found our way onto the dance floor for our first official dance as husband and wife, "I Will" by The Beatles. We danced lightly across the floor, the upbeat tune making us both smile until I saw our mothers sipping on champagne.

_More like chugging champagne._

Their heads were together in the corner of the room, and I was suddenly scared of what they were capable of.

The song then segued into "Baby It's You" and then "Here Comes the Sun," rounding out our Beatles medley, and though I tried to keep my eyes on our mothers, I was trying to enjoy myself.

When Bella finally got pulled away from my side a little while later to spend time with some friends from college, I immediately went to confront the dastardly duo. I sat beside them and they both sat up straight in their chairs, looking like they were trying to hide something. The one thing they weren't hiding was their drinking since there were six empty glasses in front of them.

"Tell me what the hell is going on, or I am using my trust fund to send both of you to Promises in the morning."

"What is Promises?" asked Renee with a slight drunken giggle.

"Rehab. Now talk."

"Phil and I love to watch that show Rehab: Party at the Palms on TV. Es, we should totally plan a trip to Las Vegas soon. Can you imagine Carlisle and Phil in Vegas?" Renee and Esme both broke out into a fit of giggles as I looked around the room, hoping we weren't making a scene.

"We could ditch them at one of the tables. Carlisle loves Craps, and then we can find one of those strip joints to visit." My eyes literally bugged out of my head as my mother patted my shoulder soothingly. "Oh relax, Captain Anal Retentive. We're gonna see men strip, not women."

"Well, that just makes it soooo much better, Mother."

"Edward, it's your wedding day, go out and have some fun. Go dance with your gorgeous bride and then take her back to your hotel for some mind blowing sex. If she's anything like her mother, I bet she's a vixen." I choked on my saliva as I heard my mother draw out the word sex and then refer to Bella and Renee as 'vixens' in the same breath.

"Oh my god. I don't even want to know how you know about Renee's sex life, but you are definitely not learning anything about mine."

"You and Bella are going to give us grandchildren one day, hopefully a whole pleth… ploth… bunch of them, so get over being a prude. We know how making babies works, so go put your disco stick in my daughter and make me a grandchild." I stood up from the table and put my hands on it roughly as I looked down at the drunken women I was forced to consider as mother figures. I was not impressed.

"I'm going to find my wife and hopefully both of you will smarten up a bit. No more drinking." My mother groaned and rolled her eyes as I felt something snap inside me. "I'm not kidding. This day has been relatively drama free, and I will not have either of you two drunken lushes ruin it for her."

I stormed away and found some solace in Bella a few minutes later as she pulled me onto the dance floor to dance to one of our favorite songs by Ray Lamontagne. Just one touch of her skin against mine and I was calm again, and able to enjoy the rest of the reception. We went through all the traditions of cutting the gigantic cake, throwing the bouquet and tossing the garter and just before we were about to leave to get in the limo back to our hotel, I noticed Renee and Esme on the dance floor, shedding some of their clothing, their arms waving wildly as some pop song encouraged their madness by singing something about a having a slumber party in a basement.

"Just go," Jasper assured us as he patted me on the back and then swept Bella into a huge hug. "I'll take care of the mothers and make sure everything gets shut down. Go enjoy the rest of your lives." I grabbed Bella's hand tightly in mine and literally pulled her away from the scene before us. We climbed into our awaiting limo, which was taking us to the Waldorf Astoria for our wedding night before we flew out in the morning to Fiji for our honeymoon.

The moment the car door closed behind us, Bella was literally all over me, her lips descending on mine as she pushed her dress up over her hips and straddled me. "Baby, there's no rush you know."

"Edward… you in a tuxedo is the sexist thing I have ever seen in my life," she murmured as she pressed her open lips to my neck. "It's been so hard for me to keep my hands off of you since the moment I saw you standing at the altar, waiting for me." Bella's eyes were dark with lust and I couldn't deny her as my hands threaded through her hair, pulling out the pins that kept it in place, as I pressed my lips hard against hers. After a few minutes of making out, her hands tugging on my hair as our tongues explored our mouths, I had released all of her hair until it was tumbling down her shoulders in soft waves.

I swept her hair out of the way and began kissing her neck desperately, my tongue laving at her soft skin as she moaned under my touch. Bella was grinding her hips against me, my cock already hard and straining to get out. We were both jolted when the car pulled to a stop and our driver knocked on the window with a light tap. When I peered out the window, I was shocked to see we had already arrived at the hotel.

The valet opened the door of the limo for us, and after a few stumbles and awkward moments on our way up to our suite, Bella and I finally got into our room and couldn't keep our hands off of each other. I pulled the zipper down the back of her dress and watched as it pooled on the floor before lifting my head to find her dressed in the most revealing and sexy lingerie I think she had ever worn for me before. It was all white, lace and satin and I was literally drooling as I watched her walk backwards across the suite with the corset wrapped around her lithe body.

"Holy fuck…"

"You like it?" Bella asked shyly as she sat on the edge of our bed and opened her legs, my eyes following the line of her legs, up from her heels to the garter belts to finally the damp panties that covered her sex.

"Holy fuck…"

"I'm glad I've rendered you speechless, Mr. Cullen, but are you just planning to stand there for the rest of the night mumbling incoherently?" I yanked at my tie and tossed it across the room as I peeled off my tuxedo jacket and then began unbuttoning my dress shirt in my haste to get closer to her. It was our wedding night, and I wanted to spend my time worshipping her. But seeing her spread out for me and so fucking eager, threw all my plans out the window. Within minutes, I had peeled all of her lingerie off and had my fingers buried inside of her wetness as she cried out for me… for more.

My mouth licked and sucked at her pert nipples, her perfectly manicured nails running down my back, while she urged me on. I buried my face in her sweet smelling neck and whispered continued proclamations of my love as I lined myself up and filled her as deep as I could. "Holy fuck…" she cursed out as her body arched against mine and I found myself licking her collarbone and up her neck before my lips found purchase against hers.

Our bodies moved in perfect sync with each others as my groans and her sweet moans filled the room. "I love you, Mrs. Cullen," I declared emphatically as I leaned back on my haunches and pulled her closer to me, her back still on the bed as her hands clutched the sheets beneath us.

"Oh Christ," Bella screamed out as I gripped her hips tighter and pushed deeper inside of her. "I love you too, Mr. Cullen." I shivered as her body began to convulse around me as she reached her rapture. It only took me a few more thrusts inside her body before I joined her in bliss, my body collapsing next to hers as I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her against me.

"Just think… we get to do that for the next several days on our honeymoon."

"We're not going to see the sights and act like crazy tourists?"

"Not if I can help it. I'd prefer we didn't leave the bedroom, Mrs. Cullen."

"I think we can make some sort of arrangement then," she said with a wink as she sweetly kissed my lips. "You can make sure any photos of our mothers stripping at our reception never see the light of day."

**A/N: I bet you wanna see their honeymoon now huh? Well, by donating a minimum of $5 to CPW and the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation, you can get it long before it makes the light of day on fanfiction (dot) net. She has currently raised over $300 for Breast Cancer Research and by supporting her, you get on the list to get the smuttastic MIFFY outtake.**

**Go to: www(dot) runforthecure (dot) com/goto/lgoodale77 and donate. You will get a response back from CPW confirming your addition to our little team. Help make a different and support breast cancer research. As an FYI, if you are American, $5 Canadian will probably only cost you $4.75. That's a steal! God bless shitty exchange rates! LOL**


	4. The Honeymoon

**A/N: This is the honeymoon outtake that was purchased by dozens of lovely women who donated to coldplaywhore's run against breast cancer in October. Through their generous donations over $800 was raised and they received their copy of the outtake over a month ago. Thanks so much for your help ladies, and we hope you all enjoy this final outtake.**

**BPOV**

"Wake up, sweet girl," I heard Edward's muffled whisper as he breathed against my hair. I moved slightly, but even the small movement made my body screech in protest. Leaning over my armrest on the airplane to lean my head on Edward's chest probably hadn't been the best idea, but it seemed good at the time.

We were on our way to our honeymoon in Fiji and the extra long flight had made me nauseous. We'd skipped the Dramamine this time, since Edward said he would rather feel sick than feel all loopy like he did on the flight out to my parents' for Thanksgiving last year. This flight, however, was much longer, and the only thing that muted the dizzy feeling in my head was sleeping against my new husband's chest, securely fitted in his arms.

I tried moving again, but the pain remained as I looked up at Edward who was glancing down at me in confusion. "Ugh. No, can't move. Do you think there are eject buttons somewhere on these seats so we can make a quick exit like those guys in the jets?" I asked groggily. I didn't want to move my head even a fraction of an inch for fear that I would either pass out or start our honeymoon with a nice romantic round of vomiting.

Even Edward's light chuckle at my ludicrous suggestion was making me dizzy. "You mean the soldiers? Baby, I don't think that would make your head any better, considering you still can't even move from my chest." He kissed the top of my head, and I smiled to myself at how well he knew me. _Being married to him is going to be the best._ "But I can carry you off the plane if you want, since you were smart and only packed one carry on."

"No, I think I'll be okay by the time we're allowed to leave the plane, but do you think you could get me some ice cold water?" I asked. I didn't know if it would actually help, but it was the only accessible thing that I could think of.

"Of course. I don't know about ice cold, but I'll see what I can do." He flagged down the nearest flight attendant and rubbed my side soothingly as we waited for her to come over to our seats.

"What can I do for you?" she asked sweetly as she looked between us with a smile, as though she knew we were newlyweds.

"Do you think my wife could get some cold water? She's not feeling too good and refuses to let me carry her," he said as he nudged me gently. I smacked him playfully and smiled up him.

"Well call me stubborn, I don't care. We just got married, don't expect me to become too dependent on you right away," I joked. The attendant giggled and I smiled at her as genuinely as I could manage considering how bad I felt.

"Not a problem, I'll be right back," she said.

"Thank you," Edward and I said at the same time. I sighed contentedly, toying with the soft fabric of his t-shirt and kissed his neck.

The flight attendant came back with my water, and it helped a little bit, enough that I could actually sit up. We got off the plane in Nadi, and picked up our luggage at the carousel before we took a cab to the harbor where we needed to catch a boat in order to reach our resort in Tokoriki.

We were staying in a beach bure, which was a more private suite right on the beach, surrounded by tall grass and small, tropical trees. The boat ride took about a half an hour and did nothing to calm my already sore body. By the time we got checked into our little private suite, Edward and I were both exhausted from our trip. We carried our bags into the quaint room, barely glancing around before dropping our suitcases on the floor. We plopped our tired, heavy bodies onto the small couch in the middle of the room and watched the breeze move the plants that surrounded our bure.

"This is nice," Edward murmured into my ear as we lay in a position that wasn't quite as comfortable as our atmosphere would suggest. Nevertheless, I hummed in agreement.

"Are you kidding? This is more than 'nice.' This is amazing. I can't wait to spend the next two weeks here," I said, curling even further into his side, trying to make myself comfortable. I meant it. Even though my head was still dizzy from the plane and my back was in pain from the position we were laying in, it was one of the most exquisite sights I had ever seen.

"Hmm," he mused. "Do you think it gets even more amazing on the bed?" he asked and before I knew it, he was standing and swooping me up from the couch and we were flying to the bed. We landed with a pillowy thump and any uncomfortable position I had ever been in was quickly forgotten. The bed was heaven with its luxurious linens and flowing canopy around it; I never wanted to leave.

"Oh my gosh. Yup, it definitely gets more amazing over here," I said, as Edward pulled me closer to his body, and my back fit perfectly against his chest.

"Are you hungry?" I asked sleepily.

"Not yet. Later," he yawned. I smiled and admired the new ring on my left hand, which was nestled beautifully next to the engagement ring that I had become accustomed to seeing there. Everything that had happened over the past few years seemed so surreal to me. From meeting Edward to falling head over heels in love with him, all the way to owning a coffee shop with him while we both strived in our art. It was just… perfection. He was perfect.

"Hey, Bella?" Edward whispered against my neck.

"Yeah?"

"Are you happy?"

I laughed, because he could truly always tell what I was thinking, even when he wasn't looking for an answer in my eyes. I turned around to face him. "Edward, I'm so happy that I'm not even going to comment on the absurdity of that question. Now shut up and cuddle with me." I turned around and closed my eyes, dreaming sweet dreams of Edward and me in our honeymoon land.

My eyes fluttered open sometime later, when I felt damp, unhurried kisses being placed along my neck and they were moving even further down my body. The room was nearly dark now, and as I glanced out onto the beach, I could see the fading sun turning the beach around us purple.

"You taste good," he whispered. I moaned, sending the sound out into the empty, quiet room, as his hands trailed up underneath my shirt to gently rub my stomach. "But I want to taste something different." He lifted my shirt, trailing kisses down my chest as I lifted my body slightly so he could unhook my bra. Edward tugged my shirt off over my head and then pulled my bra off my shoulders as I moaned when I felt his tongue delve into the valley in between my breasts. I managed to get his mouth from my body long enough to take his shirt off desperately wanting to feel the heat of his body against mine.

He took one nipple into his mouth, teasing it lightly with his teeth as I strangled a groan in my throat and prayed that he would keep moving down my body. He slowly made his way over to my other nipple, giving it just as much attention as I moaned wantonly, enjoying his every touch. "Edward," I whispered, running my hand through his hair as he looked up at me with his adoring eyes.

"That wasn't what I wanted to taste either," he said against the skin of my stomach as I looked down to see a sly smile crossing his face. His hands moved to my sides, running them softly down until the tips of his fingers reached the hem of my shorts. He tugged them, along with my underwear, down with one swift pull not even bothering to undo the button. He tossed them onto the floor and began leaving another wet trail of kisses up my thigh until he reached the spot in between my legs that was pulsing with desire for him.

Not wasting any time with teasing, his tongue swept up the already slick flesh until he reached my most sensitive spot. I moaned again, but this time louder than I had before. "Mmm, that's it," he said, swirling his tongue around my clit again as he pushed my legs open, giving him better access. "Show me how I make you feel, baby." I threaded my hands into his hair and pulled his face closer to where I wanted him most.

I felt his tongue dip inside of me, quickly followed by his thumb, as he then began pressing light circles around my clit and making me cry out for him. "God, Edward. So good," I panted as my hands wound tighter into his hair. His mouth and tongue did such amazing things to my body, bringing me to the brink over and over again until he eased two fingers inside me. His fingers moved deftly, teasing me and stroking me from the inside until I finally shuddered in bliss with just a few more swirls of his tongue as his fingers remained buried inside me.

Edward kissed the inside of my thigh once, twice and finally a third time before scooting back up the bed, and lying right beside me. "Wow," I breathed, turning to look at him, his lips shining with my desire for him. I leaned in close, touching my nose to his. "I'd kiss you right now, but you got a little somethin' right there," I said, laughing and gesturing to his mouth. Edward just laughed me off and leaned in to kiss me gently, as I tasted myself on his tender lips.

Edward stepped out of the room for a brief moment and when he sauntered back in I got up on my knees, beckoning him back to me. I grabbed his neck and pulled his mouth to mine. He wrapped his arms around me as our lips lingered together. My hands were making their way to the hardness that was straining against his shorts, but I was surprisingly interrupted. "Now I could go for some food. Do you want to go out?" he asked as he pulled away.

I quirked my eyebrow at him. "You're going to go out like that?" I asked, gesturing down to the obvious bulge in his shorts.

He shrugged. "Delayed gratification, baby."

I twisted my mouth up in confusion, but he simply plucked me up from the bed, grabbing my hand and leading us back the couch where our suitcases were. We silently got some clothes together and laid them out on the bed. "Wanna shower before we go?" he asked. That was it. I was getting what I wanted, so I put my best devilish smile on and nodded.

There was a small shower inside the bathroom with barely enough room for both of us, but definitely enough room for a little fun. Edward turned the water on as he stripped off his boxers and shorts. As soon as he was naked, I pushed him up against the shower wall and attacked his neck with my lips.

"Now," I began, indulging in the combination of the water pouring down our bodies and the way my tongue moved against his wet skin. "What kind of wife would I be, if I let you go out with that… problem?" I said, my voice vibrating against his neck. I moved my hand down to stroke his erection, and I was rewarded with a low moan escaping him.

"That's what I thought."

**/PBW&PL\**

When we finished in the shower, I slipped into one of the dresses that Alice had gotten me specifically for the honeymoon. It was deep blue jersey dress, with small straps, a nice sweetheart neckline, and it came down to my knees. It was fairly simple for me, but Alice had reminded me that layers of funky jewelry and odd clothing probably weren't the best for a honeymoon, especially if I wanted to undress easily. Edward appeared a moment later in shorts, which were similar to the ones he'd had on earlier, and a button-up shirt with his sleeves rolled up just below his elbows. It was completely unfair that he could look that good in something so simple.

"So, where are we going anyway? I can just change if this is too much, but everything I saw on the boat ride over here seemed really nice," I said casually, even though I was nervous I was overdressed.

"What you're wearing is perfect, Bella. You look beautiful," he said as he walked over to me and kissed my lips gently. "I was thinking we'd just go over to the villa, since it's not far and we don't really have time to go exploring." I nodded enthusiastically, remembering that I had admired the villa earlier in the day and I grabbed his hand as we made our way outside and strolled along the beach.

We ate dinner at the villa on a deck next to an infinity pool with lights coming up from the water, flawlessly illuminating my new husband's deep green eyes as he sat across from me. I never thought that I'd want any of this. For so long, I completely denied myself any thoughts regarding romance and marriage that the entire experience of our honeymoon was beginning to overwhelm me.

"What?" he asked as he sipped his champagne glass. We were both completely stuffed from the amazing food we'd eaten, but neither of us could pass up the opportunity for champagne.

"What, what?" I countered.

"You're looking at me funny. Like you do when you're thinking about something." I narrowed my eyes at him suspiciously. "What? I know you," he said, taking my hand and kissing my palm. My eyes began to glaze over with unshed tears. If my own thought processes weren't enough to make me emotional, then Edward's completely romantic, yet amazingly simple declarations definitely would.

"Hey, are you okay?" he asked.

I nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine. It's just… being here with you, on our _honeymoon_, it was beginning to get overwhelming for a second. This place is gorgeous, not to mention I get to look at you all night. There was such a long period in my life where never thought I'd get married, and then I met you, and I can't imagine being any happier than I am right now," I said as I swallowed the lump in my throat, barely making my speech without shedding any tears. "I love you."

His eyes radiated love as he smiled back at me. "Let's go," he said, throwing money down onto the table. My eyebrows came together in confusion, but I stood up nonetheless. Edward took my hand and we were running back down the beach before I could even begin to comprehend his reaction to what I had just said.

We stopped in the middle of the beach, and it was so dark that I could barely see his face in front of me. He crushed me to his chest and I wrapped my arms so tightly around him I was sure he would break.

"I'm so happy with you, Bella. You have no idea how lucky I feel," he began, kissing the top of my head as he held me, "that you chose me, and I still can't believe that I managed to convince you to marry me. I love you so much."

"You're the best husband ever," I murmured into his chest. He lifted me up, swaying us back and forth, and I rolled my eyes, knowing what he wanted. "You can carry me now," I relented. He laughed and put his arm underneath my knees and hoisted me up bridal style.

"Hey, this isn't _so _bad. I could get used to this," I laughed as Edward continued our walked down the beach and back to our little Fijian bure.

We barely made it inside before Edward set me down on the ground, pinning me against the doorframe. He flicked his tongue out against my neck and I interlaced my fingers through his hair in response. All I could hear was the soft sounds of the ocean and Edward's heavy breathing against my skin. Eventually, Edward moved me away from the door enough so he could slide it closed, and finally we were completely alone again.

"I want you so bad. I always fucking want you," he said huskily as we clumsily made our way over to the bed, gripping and tearing at each other's clothes. I looked down to see that Edward's shirt was already half unbuttoned, and my dress was pushed down to my waist and my bra exposed most of my breasts.

"Then have me," I said as I pushed him down onto the bed, falling on top of him. I placed my knees on either side of his body, grinding myself on the hardness I felt beneath me.

My tongue was languid against his neck, and his hands caressed my entire body as I hovered over top of him. I felt him squeeze my ass as he gripped the elastic of my panties over the fabric of my dress, but I stopped him. I stood up and began to shimmy out of the rest of my dress, taking with it my panties and bra, as seductively as I could. I tossed my clothes into the air, not caring where they landed as I noticed Edward had stood and was undoing his shorts.

I watched in fascination as he undressed hurriedly and then climbed back onto the bed. I immediately straddled him and then gripped his cock and watched as he moaned in time with my hand as I approached the tip on each up stroke. "God, I love watching you," I whispered.

I moved off of him for a moment and began teasing him with my tongue, building up his need, as my tongue lathed his hard length eagerly. I wrapped my mouth around him and sucked his cock as hard as I could, my hand gripping the base of his cock that I couldn't fit into my mouth, and I smiled against him as I listened to his groans and moans of appreciation. He sighed as I released him from my mouth, but when I climbed back onto him, my legs on either side of his body, and I sunk down onto his length, all disappointment was forgotten. Our hips immediately began moving rapidly against each other as I tore the rest of the buttons on his shirt, eager to feel the skin of his chest underneath my hands.

"I need to love you," Edward said, sitting up so he could finish removing his shirt. He wrapped his hands around my neck as our lips met. He swept his hands up my thighs, slowly moving up my body until he reached the bottom of my breasts. Our mouths only parted long enough for him to suck one of my nipples into his mouth briefly. As we kissed again, the sound of our tongues gliding alongside each other, and our teeth clanging together reverberated through my head.

Our hips continued moving swiftly in tandem, until one of my hands slipped from his shoulder in our haste, causing me to fall forward on top of him. Edward flipped us over, effectively pinning me to the bed, taking my other nipple into his mouth. I closed my eyes and was immediately brought back to earlier in the day when he had been doing the exact same things to me, making me feel all of the same wonderful feelings that were currently flowing through my body. Even though the feelings were the same, they never faded. The feelings of recognition I always experienced with him never annulled the overwhelming sensations that accompanied them.

I concentrated on the feel of him moving inside of me. "Ah, fuck, Edward," I whimpered as I felt him graze the best spot inside me. "Right there, right there… ooh yeah."

"You're so gorgeous, Bella. I could fuck you all night long and never get enough," he groaned, moving faster inside me as his breathing became labored and I knew he was reaching his peak.

"Yes… oh, god, fuck me all night," I murmured lazily as the feelings he was creating inside me began to take over.

He moved his hand between us, and I began unraveling as soon as his finger started rubbing my clit. I could feel myself tightening around him, and everything happening around me became more intense. The feel of Edward's hot breath on my neck getting faster, the sound of the sheets rustling underneath our bodies getting louder, and the pressure of his hands on my hips intensified.

"Fuck, Bella," he shouted as he twitched and came inside me. We rode it out together for a few more moments, until we eventually stilled. Edward rolled off me and laced my fingers with his as we lay beside each other. "Best first night in Fiji ever," he said.

"Agreed."

**EPOV**

The first few days of our honeymoon had been nothing short of magnificent. I really couldn't say enough about the bure we were staying in and what we had seen of the resort, although limited, had been wonderful. Other than dinner the first night, we had spent most of our time holed up in our bure, wrapped around each other and successfully shutting out the outside world.

On day three we reveled in a his and her massage that was held on the beach in front of our private hut. We didn't even need to travel far, as the masseuses came to us and had us change in our bedroom before venturing out onto the beachfront tables. Sure, the thought had crossed my mind to seduce my wife once again as I watched her undress for our massage, but I behaved myself.

Well, I did until they left an hour after they arrived. We were both so utterly relaxed and calm, our bodies relieved of what little stress we had, that we found ourselves unable to get back into the bure to fuck. I took her on the secluded lounge chair just outside our villa and both of us were completely sated afterwards, so much so that we took a nap under the shade and crashed until dinner time.

On our first Friday in Fiji I had arranged a private picnic for Bella and me on a private island not far off shore. We took a 15 minute scenic boat ride, which brought us directly to the island and our own private beach, it was simply luxurious. The chef at the resort had prepared a picnic lunch for us which we devoured as soon as we got there. Then we spend the afternoon lying out in the sun and getting rid of any tan lines we had accumulated in our time. The rest of the afternoon we snorkeled and swam in the gorgeous blue water before I took Bella on the beach and made love to her. When we got back to our bure that night, dinner was already awaiting us and we ate furiously before having a quick shower to remove the sand from all our nooks and crannies, and then we went right to bed, both of us exhausted from the long day.

One day after Bella and I had spent the morning lying in our hammock and enjoying the view, we enjoyed a quick lunch before deciding to go out and have a long swim in the ocean. After I changed into my shorts, I waited outside in one of the lounge chairs for Bella and was shocked when she came out in yet another new bikini. Apparently she and Alice had gone on quite the shopping spree in preparation for our honeymoon, all with the encouragement and black American Express card of my mother.

Today's barely there patch of fabric was a string bikini in multi-colored stripes and as Bella sauntered out onto the beach, her legs moving seductively, I found myself unable to move because I was hard as a rock. Not that that was anything new during our honeymoon.

"Are you coming Edward?" Bella asked as she turned around after walking halfway to the beach and noticed I wasn't with her yet. I coughed lightly before I stood and moved awkwardly towards her.

"Not yet, but give me a minute," I remarked under my breath as Bella winked at me and turned back away from me, continuing along the beach. I watched her for a few moments, still in shock that she was married to me, that she chose me, as I adjusted myself and grabbed some towels from a nearby chair. When I caught up to Bella, she was already knee deep in the water, so I dropped the towels on the beach and ran in after her, pulling her into my arms as we fell under the water with a loud splash. When we came up for air, we were both laughing as she then proceeded to splash water in my face.

"That was uncalled for, Mr. Cullen."

"Consider it your punishment for teasing me, Mrs. Cullen."

"Oh and how am I teasing you?" Bella questioned as she arched her back and pulled her wet hair back so it fell down her back sensually. She was fucking with me and Jesus Christ, I loved it.

"That tiny bikini for one."

"What? This old thing?" Bella said with a playful laugh as I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her collarbone before I pulled her into deeper water. We swam together for a few moments, both of us enjoying the silence and the warm water of the South Pacific.

"We both know this is new, baby. Might I add it's my favorite so far," I commented as Bella turned in the water to face me and wrapped her legs around my waist tightly. I was still standing in the water but it was more than mid chest deep on me. I clutched her forcefully, unwilling to let her go and I groaned as I felt her grind against my painfully erect cock.

"You said the same thing about all my bikinis."

"Yeah, but this one has the least amount of fabric."

"That it does," Bella replied slyly as she pulled away and swam a little bit away from me. I closed my eyes and tried to relax a little bit but when I opened my eyes, Bella was floating on her back, with the sun shining on her gorgeous body and I couldn't help myself. I swam closer to her and moved around her slowly, treading water as she remained still, soaking up the sun. She looked so calm and beautiful; she was the complete opposite of the frazzled girl I first met at the small coffee shop so long ago.

I could still picture her rain coat and owl t-shirt with perfect clarity. Of course, it made me smile brightly to think that those things now hung in a closet we shared together. I swam around a bit more, focusing on how much I adored my wife and how far we had come together. There had been so much miscommunication and wasted time, but as I floated around the water with her at my side, I knew without a doubt that everything was worth it. Every fucked up moment, every online chat and even waiting 8 hours at Central Park for my Penny Lane… she was worth it and so much more.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Bella asked, pulling me from my memories.

"Interesting choice of words; I was thinking about how we first met."

"Coffee shop or online?" she asked playfully as she came closer to me, the water splashing gently against her body.

"Both, oddly enough," I replied with a grin as Bella wrapped her hands around my neck and kissed me deeply, our tongues entwined together in sync. I pulled back and began kissing her soft neck tenderly before I spoke again. "You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, ya know?"

"Oh believe me baby, the feeling is completely mutual… did you really want to swim for a while today?"

"I'm flexible."

Bella giggled and nodded her head before swimming back to shore and beckoning me to follow her with her index finger. I watched for a moment as she grabbed a towel from the beach and used it to dry her hair before she disappeared around the corner of our bure. I was even more intrigued at this point because I knew what was around back, hidden from prying eyes and shaded by large trees, so I practically sprinted from the water and followed eagerly, finding Bella turning on the water under the outside shower.

She grabbed the towel from my hand and draped it over the half wall made of rocks before closing the space between us and running her hands down my wet body. "You know… I wanted you the first time I met you," Bella remarked as her fingers traced the hem of my shorts before she yanked them down roughly and bent at her knees before me, my cock right in front of her face. "I dreamt about doing this very thing actually."

Before I had a chance to even blink, Bella had sucked my cock into her mouth and with her hands grasped firmly on my hips, she was expertly sucking me off. It was pure fucking heaven, in the most sinful way possible. Her tongue licked at me, swirling around my shaft and my tip as she took me as deep as she could, and then pulled me out of her mouth and began stroking me, making me hard as fuck.

"Hell, I still have sex dreams about you, but now I just roll over and do something about it when I wake up," Bella admitted with a girlish giggle as her hand remained wrapped around me, sliding up and down my cock with ease. "I had this one dream shortly after we booked this honeymoon though…"

"Do tell, baby," I urged, as she stood up and pulled the strings on her bikini bottoms, letting it drop onto the ground under her. She then did the same with her top and in the blink of an eye, she was standing before me completely naked as she turned under the warm stream of water falling from the outdoor shower.

"You fucked me here… under the shower… and bent over the half wall." Bella's eyes darkened and I was certain mine followed suite as I stalked towards her, threading my fingers through her damp hair as I pulled her towards me, my mouth desperate for hers. I wrapped my arms around waist her and pulled her flush against me as I pushed her back against the shower wall, the water pouring between us as my free hand reached down to cup her breast roughly.

Bella bit down on my bottom lip and we both groaned loudly as I pulled away and began frantically kissing down her neck, my hands now grasping at her ass as I hitched her leg onto my hip, and reached down to stroke her wet pussy deftly. "Oh fuck, Edward," Bella panted breathlessly as I smacked her ass and she yelped and jumped, so I could hold her up as she wrapped both of her legs around my waist. With one swift movement, I pushed myself inside her and as she gripped my shoulders tightly, I fucked her as hard as I could, unable to get enough of being inside my wife.

"Fuck… keep… going…" Bella shouted as I buried my head in the crook of her neck and sucked on her sweet skin, biting it as I felt her walls clench around my cock. "Jesus… so good baby."

"Is this how I fucked you in your dream, baby?"

"Oh my… fuck… so much fucking better, Edward."

I gripped my hands even tighter around Bella, and I was certain that I was going to leave hand marks on her ass, but I knew she didn't care. Bella was desperately urging me on, wanting me to plunge deeper and harder inside her, and I remembered what she said about her dream as I smacked her ass and pulled out of her. Bella actually pouted, but when I grasped her hips and turned her around towards the half wall, she knew exactly what I was thinking and her beautiful pout turned into a sly smile.

"Isn't this what you wanted, babe?" I questioned as I lifted her knee onto the wall, opening her up to me. I rubbed the tip of my cock along her wet lips as she moaned and nodded her head. I slowly rubbed my hand against the small of her back as I guided myself back inside her tight pussy and began to fuck her, starting out slowly and building momentum. Bella's moans and screams were matched to my movements and just as she yelped out in release, my cock was driving inside her fast and deep, aching for my own euphoria. With two more fast pumps inside her, I came panting breathlessly as I rested my head against her back and wrapped my arms around her, clutching her as close as I could.

"So much better than my dream, sweetheart," Bella whispered gently as I kissed her shoulder and pulled out. I grabbed a towel from behind us as she turned off the water in the shower, and helped her dry off. I wrapped mine around my waist and we headed back into our bure together, always touching and reveling in our love.

We both dressed in some shorts, though Bella tossed on a tank top, and we went to rest on the hammock on our deck. When we woke an hour later after enjoying the most relaxing nap of my life wrapped around my wife, I glanced into the bure and noticed that our phone was flashing. I quirked my eye brow in confusion as only one other person knew exactly where we were staying, and as I climbed off the hammock, I headed towards the phone with trepidation.

Bella sat up and looked at me curiously as I pressed the speaker button the phone and accessed the voicemail. The moment the message began I cringed and I noticed Bella did the exact same thing.

"Edward… it's your mother," I heard the voice I least wanted to hear say.

"And your mother-in-law. Oh, I like how that sounds," Renee commented as I noticed Bella roll her eyes.

"We just wanted to check in on you guys since we hadn't heard anything since you arrived. I'm assuming that because you have voicemail that it means you got to Fiji safely," remarked my mother, but I could hear a drunken slur to her voice, which made me laugh a little bit.

"I told you Esme, they have been spending the last few days doing the horizontal tango, making whoopee, knocking boots… you know parking the Plymouth into the garage of love." Bella and I both looked at each other in mortification as my mother asked Renee the very thing I was thinking at that moment.

"Where the fuck did you get that euphemism, Renee?"

"I heard it in a porno Phil and I watched one night," she admitted as Bella jumped from the hammock, flipping over and falling flat on her face as she attempted to get to the phone to turn off the message. She had clearly heard enough, but as I ran over to help her get up and untangle her one leg that was hanging awkwardly from the hammock, the message kept playing. "The young attractive couple were fucking on the hood of a car in his auto shop, her large fake boobs sorta flying about everywhere as the guy, who clearly used a penis pump or something, was drilling her like he was searching for oil in the desert. The sex was horrible, the moaning was obnoxious, but the stupid lines he kept spouting off were funny as hell.

"What porno was it?"

"It was called _Mike Hunt's Auto Shop of Love_. I don't recommend it. If you and Carlisle need something to put some spice into your love life, I know many other reputable and kinky titles."

"Anyways, that was all off topic. Well, not really. We're just calling to make sure things are okay and see if you guys have reconsidered that 'waiting for a few years before having babies' thing. We just think it would be great if you had your kids while you were still young and spritely."

"That's it," Bella shouted as she got off the floor and stormed towards the phone, slamming her hand down on the keypad because she had no idea which one was the speakerphone button. "If I hear one more thing from them about all these babies that they want us to have, I might just insist we stay here in Fiji instead of heading back to New York. You could take pictures and make postcards for the tourists and I could… oh who am I kidding, I love Manhattan," Bella replied as she flopped down in a nearby chair in exasperation.

"And regardless of how certifiably insane our mothers are, their hearts are in the right place." Bella nodded softly as I went to the chair and I wrapped my arm around her shoulder supportively. "Don't worry, we still have another week here and I'll call the front desk and make sure we don't get any more calls from crazy drunken women in the United States."

"That's the best idea you've had since I met you."

"What… asking you to marry me wasn't a good idea?"

"Oh wait… yeah, that was good too. I love you, Edward."

"I love you too, Bella… my Penny Lane.


End file.
